SYNOPSIS: “Borderlands,” a new sci fi action comedy based on the video game series of the same name, prompted me to write words you don’t often see in the same sentence: Cate Blanchett, action star. The two-time Academy Award winner plays ruthless bounty hunter Lilith in a post-apocalyptic world, hired by the powerful president of a giant corporation (Edgar Ramírez) to track down his kidnapped daughter Tiny Tina (Ariana Greenblatt). The search leads her to the planet of Pandora, a wasteland at the edge of human civilization, home to monsters, “psychos” and a treasure trove of valuable alien technology.
CAST: Cate Blanchett, Kevin Hart, Jack Black, Edgar Ramírez, Ariana Greenblatt, Bobby Lee, Florian Munteanu, Gina Gershon, Jamie Lee Curtis. Directed by Eli Roth.
REVIEW: It’s hard to know exactly who “Borderlands” is aimed at. It shares the bright and bold aesthetic from the video games that inspired it, but the tone is radically different. The lewd and crude video game, rated M for mature audiences, features mature humor, strong language, gushes of blood and decapitation. The PG13 rated movie, directed by Eli Roth, maker of splatter movies like “Cabin Fever” and “Hostel,” smooths down the video game’s rough edges, leaving behind a movie that is neither fan service or something new.
Of course, Blanchett pulls off the action hero role. She’s Cate Blanchett and can do anything. She could play a doorknob and it would be the greatest doorknob in cinema history. It’s just too bad the script requires her to spout recycled action movie platitudes.
Kevin Hart inspires a sense of déjà vu in his portrayal of warrior Roland. He’s likable, and earns some of the film’s few laughs, but his performance here is interchangeable with almost every other character he’s ever played on screen.
Fan favorite CL4P-TP, better known as Claptrap, the chatty, uni-wheeled cycloptic robot featured in the video games, is part of the gang of characters. Voiced by Jack Black, he’s like an annoying little brother who never knows when to shut up, and, who poops bullets.
“Borderlands” aims to be a good time at the movies, but by trying to appeal to a wider audience it betrays the source material, and falls flat.
The humor in “Back on the Strip,” a new Las Vegas comedy starring Wesley Snipes, Faizon Love and J.B. Smoove as Las Vegas male strippers who return to the stage after a long hiatus, is about as subtle as the title’s insinuation is hard to understand. Which is to say, not at all.
In this “Full Monty” riff, Tiffany Haddish plays Verna, free-spirited mother to Merlin (Spencer Moore II), a wannabe magician whose life is turned upside down when his high school crush Robin (Raigan Harris) announces she is engaged to “the Michael Jordan of comedy,” on-line prankster Blaze (Ryan Alexander Holmes).
Brokenhearted, he heads to Las Vegas looking to land a gig as a magician. At an impromptu magic gig at a strip club instead of pulling a rabbit out of a hat, by accident, Merlin pulls, well, something else out of his pants. The revealing moment catches the eye of Luther a.k.a. “Mr. Big” (Snipes), the former leader of a famous Black male stripper crew called The Chocolate Chips, just as he’s thinking of putting the old band back together.
Desperate for a gig, Merlin reluctantly joins the dance crew, keeping it a secret from Verna and Robin, who, despite being engaged, is still in contact.
“Now with a man with something big in front of him,” says Luther as he intros Merlin. “I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about his future… Mr. Black Magic.”
Merlin’s life becomes complicated when Blaze decides to publicly embarrass Merlin and keep Robin all to himself. Will Merlin finally learn how to do thing his way? Will he go big or will he go home?
“Back on the Strip” is not a subtle movie. From Haddish’s raunchy narration to the predictable plot points, it’s clear writer-director Chris Spence (and co-writer is Eric Daniel) aren’t looking to reinvent the raunchy comedy wheel. It’s a mix of sweet and sour, romance for the heart and the raunchy stuff—it’s like Spencer consulted the Double Entendre Dictionary when writing Haddish’s dialogue—for the other extremities. The only really surprising thing about the movie is how far the script pushes the innuendo.
The willing cast go along for the ride with considerable collective charm. Smoove is a standout, bringing some much-needed unpredictability to every scene he is in.
Unfortunately, the emotional scenes between Merlin and Robin, meant to be heartwarming, are rendered tedious by the predictability of the script. We know what’s going to happen in this movie long before any of it actually happens and we don’t need Haddish’s expository, non-stop narration to let us know what’s going on.
Simply put, “Back on the Strip” does not have any of Mike’s magic.
Most movies for kids often have just enough adult content to give parents a chuckle as the young ones giggle to the silly stuff. “Shrek,” “Minions” and even the wholesome “Toy Story” movies have embedded subliminal messages and jokes for parents who sit dutifully by as their children watch
The same is not usually true with movies aimed at grown-ups. Mature themes about house husbanding, unfulfilled career ambitions and marital discord aren’t exactly the stuff of family movie night. And that’s what makes “Me Time,” a new Netflix comedy starring Kevin Hart and Mark Wahlberg such a head-scratcher. Hart and Wahlberg should be able to squeeze some adult laughs out of the story of self-discovery by men who explore uncharted avenues in their lives, so why is so much of the humor aimed at kids?
Hart is Sonny Fisher, husband to architect Maya (Regina Hall) and father to two adorable kids. While Maya is advancing her career, Sonny put his dreams of being a musician to stay home with the kids. At home he’s a natural. It’s in the outside world that his awkwardness comes to the fore.
On the other end of the spectrum is his best friend Huck Dembo (Wahlberg). The embodiment of YOLO, he’s a party-boy and a risk-taker with a way with a phrase.
When Maya convinces Sonny to opt out of a family vacation and take some “me time,” he reluctantly agrees and winds up on Huck’s latest birthday adventure, a trip to Burning Man with a bus load of party people.
Cue the odd mix of adult reckoning and infantile gags.
“Me Time” wastes its two leads in a sea of wasted opportunities. Individually, Hart and Wahlberg bring the funny, so the comedic combo effect should be doubled, but director John “Along Came Polly” Hamburg keeps his two stars apart for most of the film’s first half. By the time their hijinks really begin, the mix of sincerity and silly has already worn thin. Both actors try hard to elevate the poop jokes and frenetic physical comedy, but are left hanging by a script that attempts to mix-and-match adult concerns with juvenile jokes.
The result is a movie that feels like it can’t decide who it is for, the poop joke audience or the buddy comedy crowd.
“Me Too” is a childish movie that attempts to examine what it means to be an adult.
We all know that Jor-El and Lara, sent their infant son Kal-El to Earth minutes before their planet Krypton self-destructed. Less known is the story of Kal-El’s Kryptonian Labrador Retriever, the boy’s faithful best friend, who leapt into the Earth-bound spaceship to start a new life on the little blue planet third from the sun. “Look after our son,” Jor-El says as the ship careens out of sight in “DC League of Super Pets,” a new animated movie now playing in theatres.
When we meet them on Earth they are now settled in Metropolis and are known as Clark Kent a.k.a. Superman (John Krasinski) and Bark Kent a.k.a. Krypto (Dwayne Johnson). “I’m his ride or die,” Krypto brags. They live the lives of best friends, sharing an apartment, watching their favorite cooking shows on the Food Network and fighting crime. “My only friend is Superman,” Krypto sings to John Williams’ “Superman” theme. They are inseparable, except for the time Superman spends with his girlfriend, and Daily Planet reporter, Lois Lane (Olivia Wilde).
Sensing that Krypto needs a friend, Superman visits the local animal rescue, just as Ace (Kevin Hart), is making a run for it. In the cage above him is Lulu (Kate McKinnon), a hairless guinea pig who was once a test subject for Superman’s archenemy Lex Luthor (Marc Maron). The supervillain is experimenting with orange kryptonite, a variation of the green kryptonite that saps Superman’s powers.
In a battle of the superheroes and supervillains, Superman and Krypto are hobbled by green kryptonite while the orange kryptonite empowers Ace, Lulu and the other rescue animals. “I figured out something Lex didn’t know,” Lulu gloats. “Orange doesn’t work on people. It only works on pets!”
It is revealed that Lulu is an evil genius who, with the help of her newly recruited injustice squad, plans on reuniting with Luthor and putting an end to the work of the Justice Squad, Wonder Woman (Jameela Jamil), Aquaman (Jemaine Clement), The Flash (John Early), Cyborg (Daveed Diggs), Batman (Keanu Reeves) and Green Lantern (Dascha Polanco).
Now, it’s up to Krypto, with the help of Ace and the other super pets, to rescue Superman and the world savers.
“DC League of Super Pets” tries hard to mold the superhero movie formula into a kid-friendly shape. For much of the movie director Jared Stern succeeds. Supes and Krypto have a good ‘n goofy relationship, punctuated by funny banter and antics. Everyday chores, like dog walking are given a superhero spin as Superman and Krypto’s daily constitutional becomes a supersonic flight around the world, powered by their extranormal abilities.
Kids should also get a kick out of fun characters like McKinnon’s sarcastically sinister Lulu, the Natasha Lyonne-voiced Merton McSnurtle, the turtle with superspeed, and a cat who coughs up hand grenade furballs. Parents should appreciate the good life lessons about team work, sharing, learning by listening and being true to yourself to unlock your true powers, while getting a laugh out of the film’s more self-aware moments. “Every superhero struggles to learn their powers, “ says PB (Vanessa Bayer), a potbellied pig who can change size at will, “until they have their training montage.”
But, and there is a but, the movie eventually goes the way of all superhero movies and devolves into a loud, messy climax that feels as though it doesn’t line up with the kid friendly action that came before it.
“DC League of Super Pets” doesn’t have the same sense of fun as “The Lego Batman Movie,” and sticks too closely to the adult style of storytelling we’ve come to expect from superhero movies—there are even two after credit scenes—but it does deliver some cute characters and a handful of superlaughs.
There is nothing particularly “next level” about the second instalment of the all-star, rebooted “Jumanji” franchise. It provides pretty much exactly the same level of entertainment delivered by 2017’s “Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle,” a family-friendly action flick that offered up some good-natured laughs.
The last time around nerdy gamer Spencer Gilpin (Alex Wolff), mean girl Bethany Walker (Madison Iseman), jock Anthony “Fridge” Johnson (Ser’Darius Blain) and Martha Kaply (Morgan Turner) were assigned to detention. Stuck in a storage room, they found a dusty old Jumanji gaming console. They turn it and the game sputters to life. “A game for those who seek to find,” it says, “a way to leave their lives behind.” Each clicked on an avatar and were suddenly swept away into the world of the game, plopped down in the Jumanji jungle and in the middle of an escapade. They also looked different. Their teenage selves are gone, replaced by heroic videogame characters. Spencer is now Dr. Smolder Bravestone (Dwayne Johnson), a buff hero, fearless with no vulnerabilities. Martha is warrior Ruby Roundhouse (Karen Gillan) while Fridge is zoologist Moose Finbar (Kevin Hart). The biggest change was reserved for Bethany who became cryptographer Professor Sheldon Oberon (Jack Black).
The old gang is back, and when Spencer disappears inside the game they follow along, with some new faces in the form of Spencer’s cranky granddad Eddie (Danny DeVito), the old man’s former business partner Milo (Danny Glover) and a new avatar played by Awkafina.
Once back in the videogame world of Jumanji they must find Spencer and protect a scared gem, keeping it out of the hands of a merciless warlord played by “Game of Thrones’” Rory McCann. Cue a cacophony of close calls, mismatched body swapping, CGI and silly jokes that feel left over from the 2017 movie.
Like most real-life video games “Jumanji: The Next Level” is most fun when they’re actually playing the game and not standing around talking about playing the game.
After a deadly first half-hour that reunites the original cast the film briefly picks up speed when the characters land in Jumanji only to discover they aren’t who they used to be. Moose now looks like Kevin Hart but has Danny Glover’s grandfatherly personality. Eddie wound up as the muscle-bound Dr. Smolder Bravestone and Professor Sheldon Oberon has adopted Bethany’s former avatar, Professor Shelly Oberon. The switcheroos provide some laughs, particularly Hart’s take on Glover’s deliberate (i.e. glacial) dialogue delivery. He nails it, slowing down his usual mile-a-minute style to milk laughs from lines like, “Jurgen the Brutal. Is that Barbara’s boy?”
Johnson has a harder time replicating DeVito’s New Jersey twang, especially in the film’s rare dramatic moments.
The rest of the film is action, herds of ostriches and mandrills attack and there are improbable fight scenes but all are so CGI heavy that they don’t connect. Instead they offer up roughly the same level of thrills as a theme park ride, which, no doubt this will one day be if it isn’t already.
“Jumanji: Welcome to the Jungle” appealed to audiences with a mix of charismatic actors having a good time in a silly story and inventive action. For the most part “The Next Level” goes the way of so many other sequels, replacing the original charm with a story that is larger and louder but not as engaging. “I can’t believe you came back here on purpose,” says Martha. You may wonder that yourself as the end credits roll.
You get three stories for the price of one in the 100% Louis CK-free “The Secret Life of Pets 2.” The episodic sequel to the 2016 animated hit front loads a lot of plot into its snappy 87 minutes but doesn’t forget to blend in life messages for kids on finding inner courage. “The first step in not being afraid,” says wily old sheepdog Rooster (Harrison Ford), “is acting like you are not afraid.”
Jack Russell Terrier Max, previously voiced by CK, now sounds like Patton Oswalt. He and his odd couple pal, the shaggy Newfoundland mix Duke (Eric Stonestreet), now must now share their Brooklyn home with a new roommate, their owner’s (Ellie Kemper) new baby Liam. The toddler’s presence raises Max anxiety level—”He is perfect,” Max says fretfully, “and I will keep him safe.”—until the family takes a trip to the country and he meets Rooster, a Yoda-like character who teaches him to be himself and not be an overprotective helicopter parent for Liam.
Meanwhile Max’s girlfriend, a vivacious Pomeranian named Gidget (Jenny Slate), must take lessons in how to act like a tabby from her catnip-loving feline friend Chloe (Lake Bell) to rescue Max’s favorite squeaky toy from an apartment overrun by cats.
Then, when Molly (Kiely Renaud) starts dressing bunny and former flushed pet Snowball (Kevin Hart) in cute superhero pajamas he believes the hype and behave like a movie crime fighter. His skills are tested when a brave Shih Tzu named Daisy (Tiffany Haddish) asks him to assist on a dangerous mission. “I don’t mean to sound dramatic,” she says, “but a poor defenseless animal needs saving.”
Themes of inner courage and facing fears are woven through each story and come together the last twenty minutes or so as the pets all join forces.
The Gidget and Snowball storylines have the kind of playfulness you expect from Illumination, the company that gave us the anarchic jellybean-shaped Minions. Max’s life-altering adventures on the farm, which take up a great deal of the scant running time, feels borrowed from other, better kid-friendly fare like the “Toy Story” franchise.
The voice work is a mixed bag. Ford is a howl as the gruff old timer who imparts life-changing advice. If they do another of these “Pets” movies he should graduate to main character status. Slate is a hyperactive bundle of energy and Hart and Haddish are a fun duo that add much spark to their segment. Oswalt, so distinctive in “Ratatouille,” doesn’t teach Max any new tricks.
“The Secret Life of Pets 2” feels like three episodes of a “Pets” television show banged together to (almost) feature length. Pet lovers may recognize and enjoy some of the behavior—a cat coughing up a hairball on her sleeping owner and the protective nature of Max and Rooster—but it won’t beat spending the day with your real-life, cuddly pet.
Remake happy Hollywood goes intercontinental, casting its eyes to France for the new Bryan Cranston, Kevin Hart film. “The Upside’s” based-on-a-true-story” odd couple story of a wealthy quadriplegic and his ex-con caretaker is lifted from “The Intouchables,” a movie so popular it was voted France’s cultural event of 2011.
Cranston plays Phillip Lacosse, an author, who, through clever investments is “richer than Jay-Z.” A hand-gliding accident has left him paralyzes, a prisoner in his fancy Park Avenue apartment. When parolee Dell Scott (Hart) shows up on his doorstep looking for a job Phillip hires him, even though he has no qualifications whatsoever. As an ex-con Dell will, Phillip figures, enforce his Do Not Resuscitate order. “Is that why you asked me instead of those other guys?” Dell asks. “‘Cuz you thought I would DNR your ass?”
Also in the mix are Dell’s ex wife Latrice (Aja Naomi King) their son Anthony (Jahi Di’Allo Winston) and Phillip’s devoted assistant Yvonne (Nicole Kidman).
Despite the fatalistic Phillip’s disinterest in life he gradually comes to life, spewing a series of dad jokes and doling out practical advice. The two men bond, learning from one another. Dell learns an appreciation of his boss’s open mind—both in curiosity and acceptance—while Phillip is exposed to Aretha Franklin, weed (for medical purposes) and New York City hot dog stands. Each is enriched as Phil rediscovers his lust for life and Dell becomes a better father and husband.
What “The Upside” lacks in originality—every plot point is telegraphed to point where anyone, even if they had never seen a movie before, will see where this is going—it almost makes up in committed performances from its leads.
Hart is unusually restrained, heaping on the earnestness and the occasional bit of slapstick. He earns a few laughs although a “funny” catheter scene isn’t going to bolster Hart’s bruised rep in the LGBTQ community.
Cranston does wonders with a performance that comes completely from the shoulders up. His expressive face conveys a range of emotions from utter joy to frustration to unbridled rage it’s a performance that subtly brings us into Phillips thought processes.
Only Kidman is wasted in a role that asks very little of her except to nod, do a little dance and add some heft to the marquee.
Despite strong performances “The Upside” is a slight feel good movie that values melodramatic and manipulation over real emotion.
Do we boycott what looks to be a good movie because originally it was produced by Harvey Weinstein and Kevin Hart is in it? Richard and NewsTalk 1010 host Jerry Agar discuss.
