I take a look back at the year that was at the movies. From an apocalyptic musical and a haunted pool to a sinfully dull exorcism movie and mysterious masked marauders, the movies gifted us the best and worst–the naughty and nice, the champagne and lumps of coal–of what Hollywood and elsewhere has to offer.
Here is the Naughty List, a compendium of my least favorite films of the year, presented alphabetically.
“Argylle” has so many twists, not even Chubby Checker could keep up. It is an outrageous, twisty-turny idea trapped in a movie that is afraid to really cut loose.
Amy Winehouse was a singular artist, a fearless performer who made her own rules, and dug deep to create her art. So, it’s a shame her biopic “Back to Black” is such a standard cautionary tale that only skims the surface.
“Borderlands” shares the bright and bold aesthetic from the video games that inspired it but smooths down the rough edges of the game, leaving behind a PG13 rated movie that is neither fan service or anything new.
“The Crow” is back, but, unfortunately, never really takes flight. For a movie about soulmates, and with a villain who dooms souls to hell, the new film feels soulless.
“Damaged” is a feature film that feels like episodic television, right up to a cliffhanger-y ending that should come with a “To Be Continued” end credit.
For all the free-wheeling vibes the movie emits, Ethan Coen’s “Drive-Away Dolls” is a bit of a slog, even at its abbreviated 84 minute runtime.
“The End” is an audacious film, with very committed performances from the cast, but this bleak study of guilt becomes overwhelmed by pretension and wears out its welcome well before the end credits roll.
Russell Crowe’s considerable star power goes a long way to keep “The Exorcism” watchable, but the film’s lack of overall lack of drama and scares is a sin.
“The Fabulous Four” means well but is a less than fabulous film that doesn’t deliver the goods.
The Quebec-set “French Girl” may be the only rom com to feature Mixed Martial Arts as a plot point. Other than that, it’s a standard romantic comedy, heavy on the romance but light on the comedy.
“Here” is ambitious, but its technical aspects, like the dead-eyed digital de-aging of Tom Hanks and Robin Wright, overwhelms whatever heart is embedded in the story.
For better and for worse, “Joker: Folie à Deux” mixes romance and show tunes with law and order in what may be the bleakest jukebox musical ever. It is ambitious and bold, like All That Jazz filtered through a funhouse mirror, but it’s also frustrating.
Origin stories are tough, and unfortunately, “Madame Web” isn’t up to the task. By the time the end credits roll, you’ll wish you had the power to see into the future, like Cassandra Webb, so you’d know to skip this one.
“Megalopolis” is idiosyncratic a movie as we’re likely to see this year.
Drenched in metaphor and allegory, the dark comedy “Mother, Couch” breathes the same air as Charlie Kaufman and Ari Aster, but director Niclas Larsson allows the metaphysical aspects of the movie to overwhelm the story’s true emotion.
The idea of drowning is terrifying, especially if someone or something is pulling at your legs, or pushing your head under the surface, but in “Night Swim” you’ll find yourself playing Marco Polo in search of actual scares.
A Christmas movie with product placement for the whole family, from Hot Wheels to Bulleit Bourbon, “Red One” a formulaic action film, with generic CGI battles and Johnson in automaton mode.
In “The Strangers: Chapter One,” irector Renny Harlin squeezes whatever juice is left out of The Strangers IP, building a bit of tension here and there, but the film’s slow pace, repetitive action and decidedly non-gruesome violence sucks away the menace of the premise.
SYNOPSIS: “The Crow,” a re-imagining of the classic gothic superhero series of the same name, sees troubled souls Eric Draven (Bill Skarsgård,) and Shelly Webster (FKA Twigs) become soulmates after escaping from a rehab center. On the run from bad man Vincent Roeg’s (Danny Huston) violent thugs, the pair form an unbreakable bond, even in death. Given the chance to save his true love by sacrificing himself, Draven navigates the worlds of the living and the dead to seek vengeance against her killers. “Kill the ones who killed you, and you will get her back.”
CAST: Bill Skarsgård, FKA Twigs, Danny Huston, Josette Simon, Laura Birn, Sami Bouajila, Isabella Wei, Jordan Bolger. Directed by Rupert Sanders.
REVIEW: “The Crow” is back, but, unfortunately, never really takes flight. Director Rupert Sanders and cinematographer Steve Annis create a beautiful, neo-noir gothic canvas as a backdrop to the story of the power of love as a tool for revenge, but no amount of atmosphere can make up for spotty storytelling and murky mythology.
The film’s first forty minutes, the story of star-crossed lovers Eric and Shelly, drags as the two meet, flirt and get to know one another. Trouble is, sparks don’t exactly fly. The basis of the story is immortal love, one that cannot be broken by anything, even death, and yet their courtship feels impetuous, not particularly romantic. That lack of chemistry blunts the effectiveness of the movie’s emotional foundation and delays the start of The Crow ‘s story until midway through the film.
As for the action, it does deliver some OTT John Wick style violence, but I wouldn’t call this an action movie. The action is used sparingly, relegated to two big set pieces. Of those, it’s the opera house sequence that delivers the cathartic, nasty kills fans might want. It’s gross and gory as Draven gives new meaning to the question, “Why don’t you smile?” (You’ll know what I mean when you see the movie.) It goes for it, delivering the straightforward revenge vibe you expect, but it also makes you wonder why the rest of the movie doesn’t have the same energy or comic book sensibility.
Skarsgård is suitably angsty, and can handle himself in the action scenes, but despite his best efforts, the specter of Brandon Lee’s indelible performance in the original cult classic looms large over this version.
“The Crow” suffers from a lackluster villain (the usually reliable Danny Huston) and slow pacing, but its worst crime is that for a movie about soulmates, with a baddie who dooms souls to hell, “The Crow” feels soulless.
The news of Philip Seymour Hoffman’s sudden passing was met with a heartfelt outpouring of grief from fans and those who worked with him.
“Philip Seymour Hoffman was a singular talent and one of the most gifted actors of our generation,” Lionsgate, the studio behind the upcoming Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 1 and 2, said in a written statement. “We’re very fortunate that he graced our Hunger Games family. Losing him in his prime is a tragedy, and we send our deepest condolences to Philip’s family.”
Hoffman played head -games-maker-turned-rebel leader Plutarch Heavensbee in the successful series. It is a pivotal role.
In the wake of the actor’s death, questions arose as to whether the uncompleted blockbusters-in-waiting would be completed in time for their scheduled November 21, 2014 for Part 1 and November 20, 2015 for Part 2 release dates.
Hollywood studios have handled the sudden death of cast members in many different ways. In some cases, films are even abandoned.
Production on Something’s Got to Give was shut down permanently after Marilyn Monroe’s August 1962 barbiturate overdose.
Dark Blood, River Phoenix’s final film, was put into cold storage when the young actor died before filming several crucial scenes. But both movies were eventually resurrected. The documentary Marilyn: The Final Days used footage from Monroe’s aborted film while Dark Blood sat for 19 years before being finished and shown at film festivals.
Father and son Bruce and Brandon Lee both died early, leaving behind unfinished films. The elder martial arts legend had completed 100 minutes of The Game of Death when a cerebral edema took his life.
Even more tragically, Brandon was killed on the set of The Crow in an accident involving a prop handgun.
Both films were salvaged with the use of stand-ins.
When Oliver Reed collapsed of a heart attack at a Malta pub after out-drinking a group of Royal Navy sailors, the editing crew of Gladiator replaced him digitally in the remaining scenes of the film.
More recently, Heath Ledger unexpectedly died during the production of The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus. He was replaced in the surreal story by three actors.
“I just started calling friends of Heath,” director Terry Gilliam said. “It’s as simple as that.”
“Johnny (Depp), Colin (Farrell) and Jude (Law) turned up. It was important that they were friends, because I wanted to keep it in the family. I wanted people who were close to him because, as Colin said when he was doing his part, he was channelling Heath part of the time, so Heath was very much still alive in some sense.
“Contractually, it was supposed to be a Terry Gilliam Film,” said Gilliam. “That’s what the lawyers said, but I said, ‘No way it’s going to be that. It’s going to be a film from Heath Ledger and friends.’ The cast sat around one night and that idea came up and I said, ‘This is it. Perfect. That’s how we do it.’”
As for the upcoming Hunger Games films, reports now confirm that Hoffman completed work on Part 1 and had just seven days left of shooting on Part 2.
His absence will not require any recasting, just a rewrite of one scene. And so Mockingjay Part 2 becomes the final film in Hoffman’s remarkable career.
“Words cannot convey the devastating loss we are all feeling right now. Philip was a wonderful person and an exceptional talent, and our hearts are breaking,” reads a statement released by The Hunger Games author Suzanne Collins, the films’ director Francis Lawrence, producers Nina Jacobson and Jon Kilik and star Jennifer Lawrence.
I take a look back at the year that was at the movies. From an apocalyptic musical and a haunted pool to a sinfully dull exorcism movie and mysterious masked marauders, the movies gifted us the best and worst–the naughty and nice, the champagne and lumps of coal–of what Hollywood and elsewhere has to offer.
