Richard Crouse

SYNOPSIS: In the new thriller “A Working Man” action hero Jason Statham, and his perfect stubble, return to the big screen as Statham Character #2. That’s the “loner with a past who must protect a youthful innocent.”  (As opposed to Statham Character #1 in which he plays “a loner with a past who must protect a loved one.”) This time around he’s a former Royal Marines commando who currently works as a construction worker in Chicago. When his boss’s daughter is forced into human trafficking, he uses his special set of skills to rescue her.

CAST: Jason Statham, Michael Peña, and David Harbour. Directed by David Ayer, written by Ayer and Sylvester Stallone

REVIEW: I enjoy Jason Statham’s movies, though they often feel repetitive, like a single story stretched over many films.

I had my usual sense of déjà vu while watching “A Working Man” and when I sat down to write this review it occurred to me that, just as Statham has been making the same movie over and over again, I’ve been writing essentially the same review over and over again.

In that spirit I made a new review out of my previous Statham writings by only changing a title or two.

(From my review of “The Mechanic,” 2011) Jason Statham isn’t so much an actor as he is a brand. When you go to McDonald’s you know you can expect the two all-beef patties, special sauce and the sesame seed bun to taste the same whether you’re in Toronto or Hong Kong. It’s that kind of brand management that has made Statham a star. You know what to expect from his movies—rippling abs, some high kicking action, his trademarked facial stubble and loads of explosions. It’s a simple formula but one that works for his fans. Perhaps the advertising slogan for his new film, INSERT TITLE HERE should be “New, But Not Improved.”

(From my review of “Killer Elite,” 2011) Statham plays INSERT CHARACTER NAME HERE, an ex- specials ops agent. He’s mad, bad and dangerous to know but trying to cool it on the whole killing people thing. But like Michael Corleone, every time he thinks he’s out they pull him back in. He’s convinced to strap on a gun once again when his INSERT CHARACTER HERE is kidnapped.

(From my review of “Wrath of Man,” 2021) Gone is the jokey Statham of “Spy” and his over-the-top “Fast and Furious” work. This is a back-to-basics performance that sees him settle on one facial expression, as though his chiseled face is encased in amber, to convey the character’s one deadly motive. The taciturn thing has worked for him before, and it works well here.

(From my review of “Parker,” 2013) “INSERT TITLE HERE” is a Jason Statham movie, with all that implies. The good is a brooding physicality he brings to his roles. He looks like he could snap your neck with his steely glare, so when he does it on screen, it works.

(From my review of “Homefront,” 2013) [In other words] I liked INSERT TITLE HERE when Statham was punching people. I liked it less when he wasn’t.

SYNOPSIS: In “Heart Eyes,” a new comedy slasher flick now playing in theatres, a serial killer with glowing hearts for eyes, murders couples on Valentine’s Day. When he mistakes Ally and Jay for a romantic couple, the co-workers spend their Valentine’s Day on the run from the Heart Eyes Killer. “He’s like Cupid with a kink.”

CAST: Olivia Holt, Mason Gooding, Gigi Zumbado, Michaela Watkins, Devon Sawa, and Jordana Brewster. Directed by Josh Ruben.

REVIEW: “Heart Eyes” is a wild movie.

Is it a violent rom com? Yup. Is it a googly-eyed slasher flick? Also correct. By the time the end credits roll, director Josh Ruben has thrown teen comedy, rom coms and slasher flicks into a blender, and whipped up a tasty cocktail of “Scream” and “10 Things I Hate About You.”

The thrill killer with heart shaped eyes takes a back seat to Ally and Jay, nicely played by Olivia Holt and Mason Gooding. Ruben takes his time developing their relationship, whether it as two strangers who flirt, or a warrior duo doing battle against an unrelenting killer. It slows the film’s momentum, creating lengthy periods when there isn’t much happening.

At least by the standards of a bloody slasher flick.

By the time the going gets gory, the relationship is built, and Ruben has fun playing with genre conventions. As Ally starts to warm to Jay after a particularly gruesome Heart Eyes attack, she says, “Tonight should have been the worst night of my life, but it wasn’t.”

“Ditto” he replies.

In a different context those lines could have appeared in a hundred other cheesy rom coms, but here it is funny, a nod to the audience that “Heart Eyes” isn’t taking itself too seriously.

I’m not sure if “Heart Eyes” is a satire of slashers with some romance or the other way around. What I do know is that it is a snappy 90 minutes in which both rom commers or horror fans should find something to enjoy.