“If you go out in the woods today. You’re sure of a big surprise.” The surprise in “Teddy Bear’s Picnic” is fairly benign—teddy bears eating and “having a lovely time”—but a new movie makes the woods out to be a much more surprising and scary place. Just as Hansel and Gretel ignored warnings about the woods and ended up coming across a cannibalistic witch, “The Forest” proves there’s nothing enchanting about this enchanted forest.
Set in the Aokigahara Forest, a real life place at the base of Japan’s Mount Fuji also known as the Suicide Forest, the movie sees Sara (“Game of Thrones’” Natalie Dormer) in search of her missing twin sister Jess (also played by Dormer). Sara recruits expat American Aiden (“Chicago Med’s” Taylor Kinney)—who, helpfully, is fluent in Japanese—and “suicide hike” guide Michi (Yukiyoshi Ozawa) to help her navigate the dense, dangerous woods. “People say spirits cannot rest there. They come back ANGRY!” Michi warns them to always stay on the path and insists they leave by sundown, but most ominously tells them, “The spirits make you see things and make you want to die!” Of course after locating Jess’s campsite just before dark Sara won’t leave and Aiden is too much of a gentleman to leave her there alone. Michi hightails it, leaving the two at the mercy of the forest’s bad mojo. Is what Sara is seeing real, or a dark fantasy caused by restless spirits?
A better name for “The Forest” would have been “Hell Hike” given the hellish amount of time we watch Sara and Aiden plodding through the woods. It’s one of those movies where you often feel like something is about to happen and then… pfffffft. It’s all anticipation and little payoff. There are a handful of jump scares—loud noises designed to give you a jolt—but they don’t add much to the story or raise many goosebumps.
Perhaps if the trio of writers (Nick Antosca, Sarah Cornwell and Ben Ketai) responsible for this skimpily plotted psychological drama spent more time on creating characters we cared about (sorry Sara and Jess) or building some actual tension we could excuse the barebones plot. The idea of the suicide forest is a good one but the movie doesn’t trust us to understand the stakes and continually—and annoyingly—reminds us that going into the forest is BAD. We get it. Now scare us.
Add to that clumsy metaphors—Jess went to the forest to battle her personal demons, now Sara is battling real ones!—and you’re left with a good justification for cinematic clearcutting.
Usually the scariest thing about Vin Diesel is the amount of money his movies make. The Fast and Furious franchise has raked in more than $4 billion. Add in revenue from Guardians of the Galaxy and Riddick and you have a truly terrifying amount of money.
In his new film, The Last Witch Hunter, the raspy-voiced actor boasts, “You know what I’m afraid of? Nothing,” as he delivers scares playing an immortal warrior who must prevent evil New York witches from destroying the world. The 48-year-old is so convinced the movie will do well, he’s already announced that the studio is developing a sequel.
“The first one doesn’t hit theatres until October 23rd,” he wrote on Facebook in July, “yet they want me to commit and already block out time to film it.”
Before Fast and Furious made him Hollywood’s version of an ATM, Diesel made baby steps towards becoming a superstar. Director Steven Spielberg saw Multi-Facial, Diesel’s self directed, written, produced and scored über low budget short film and was so taken with the young actor he had the role of Private Caparzo in Saving Private Ryan specially written for him. The result was an effective performance that mixed physicality with poignancy. Winning the role, he says, was “like one of those Hollywood fairy tales that you never believed.”
Critics began to take notice. New York Times critic A.O. Scott said he, “may be the sexiest ugly man in movies since Anthony Quinn” as Diesel lent his distinctive gravelly voice to the title character in the animated film The Iron Giant and played streetwise stockbroker Chris Varick in the 2000 stockbroker drama Boiler Room.
His breakout performance came with the sci-fi film Pitch Black. “Richard B. Riddick,” he says by way of introduction. “Escaped convict. Murderer.” Artificial eyes allow Riddick to see in the dark, making him very useful when bloodthirsty creatures attack during a month-long eclipse. The character became a franchise for the actor, spawning sequels, video games and animated films.
“I know it sounds corny but I feel like I learn about myself when I play that character,” said Diesel. “Going to that dark isolated place produces some kind of vision or understanding about myself. He mirrors my own quest for identity, my eternal quest as a child.”
Movies like Knockaround Guys and Babylon A.D. played on his tough guy persona, but with The Pacifier he tried to switch from cracking ribs to tickling funny bones. Playing a Navy Seal assigned to protect a house full of out-of-control kids, he attempted to prove he was more than just a muscle mass that got lucky in pictures. The chaotic comedy made some money, but ultimately proved Diesel’s strength lay in muscle, not mayhem.
Since then he has stayed the course, pumping out action-adventure films — including the soon-to-be relaunched xXx — proving himself to be a great action star. Smarter than Stallone, younger than Schwarzenegger and with even less hair than Bruce Willis, his appeal transcends his biceps, as he also appears to have a brain in his head. Throw in a large dollop of charisma and look out Jason Statham, you’re about to be kick boxed into the old age home.
Vin Diesel looks good for an 800 year-old-man… er… immortal witch hunter. He’s Kaulder, a former mortal whose family was wiped out by the Witch Queen’s (Julie Engelbrecht) deadly black plague. The only way to destroy her is to still her beating heart, but before he can do so she places a hex on him. With all his family gone he has nothing to live for, so she curses him with immortality.
Centuries later he’s a supernatural superman, living in a swank Central Park South apartment and bedding flight attendants when he’s not subduing bad witches. Known as “the Weapon,” he works with a Dolan—a spiritual advisor—and helps enforce the uneasy truce that has been struck between witches and humans. When Dolan 36 (Michael Caine) steps down and winds up dead within twenty-four hours (“I’ve seen people get old, retire and die but rarely on the same day,” Kaulder says.) the hunter knows evil forces are at work. With the aid of Dolan 37 (Elijah Wood) and an unlikely witch ally (“Game of Thrones” star Rose Leslie) Kaulder seeks to finally put an end to an ancient evil.
“You know what I’m afraid of?” asks Kaulder. “Nothing. It’s boring really.” And so is “The Last Witch Hunter” because nothing remotely scary happens. It’s as though the film was originally written as a straight ahead action movie. Here’s the pitch: Gravelly-voiced man fights the baddies with the help of an aging mentor and a sidekick. It’s the generic hero’s journey. It’s “The Dark Knight” without the cape (but with Michael Caine). It feels like someone read the script early on and said, “You know what would make this great? Witches and Vin Diesel,” but even the addition of supernatural elements like Dreamwalkers, cranky witches and immortality can’t disguise the fact that this is as generic an action movie as we’ve seen this year.
It follows a familiar pattern: Action scene followed by witch hunting mumbo jumbo that segues into a fight scene. Reset with a buddy, buddy scene featuring dialogue like, “You’re not qualified for what happens next.” Add to the mix flashbacks, light romance and loud special effects and you have every generic action movie ever made… with witches.
Diesel is fast and furious enough to deliver the “Conan the Barbarian” level dialogue (like: “The benefit of eternal life is that I get to kill you twice!”) with conviction but the movie is dull enough you’ll wish these witches would go away for a spell.
One question hangs heavy over “The Transporter: Refueled” (sic), Can the franchise survive and thrive without its former star Jason Statham? The action hero drove off into the sunset after three instalments, leaving it up to “Game of Thrones” actor Ed Skrein to take his place. Can Skrein put the pedal to the metal or is the series headed to the junkyard?
Skrein is the Transporter. No names please, it only complicates things. He is a skilled driver who delivers packages for anyone who agrees with his rather stringent demands—no lateness, detailed weight restrictions and once the deal is made if the deal changes, he walks away.
Against the backdrop of the French Riviera the Transporter and his newly retired spy father Frank Martin Sr. (Ray Stevenson) soon finds themselves involved in a dangerous revenge plot against a vicious Russian pimp (Radivoje Bukvic) staged by Junior’s newest clients, four prostitutes willing to die to get away from their old lives.
“The Transporter: Refueled” is a slick looking movie that substitutes squealing tires for story. It adheres to the fight scene/car chase formula that drove the Statham’s “Transporter” triptych but the dark humour and the wink of the older films is missing. Skrein is all business, a grim-faced chauffeur who can take a punch and throw a kick with a wild style that would make Jackie Chan proud, but it all seems rather joyless. Stevenson has the charm to pull this off but is a secondary character, mostly left in the background.
Then there are the female revenge plot masterminds (Loan Chabanol, Tatiana Pajkovic and Gabriella Wright), the supposedly strong female characters at the heart of the movie. They are capable of pulling off a major heist and going-head-to-head with Russian bad guys but, for some reason, become freaked out squealing school girls at the prospect of driving through a gate secured only with a flimsy chain. Skrein simply frowns and gets on with the job but the women react as though they’re about to jump off a cliff and later, jump into bed with their rescuers as a sign of gratitude.
Some grrrl power.
But what did I expect? Ten minutes in it’s clear why “The Transporter: Refueled” isn’t in 3D. It’s because the characters are so one-dimensional they simply couldn’t exist in three dimensions. Instead they are cartoons, existing in a world where you’re shot, near dead one day, wearing a tight dress and kicking butt the next.
“The Transporter: Refueled” is a silly movie, and that’s OK, lots of silly movies are entertaining and worth your money. Unfortunately “The Transporter: Refueled” isn’t one of them.
Based on English writer Vera Brittain’s 1933 memoir about her experiences during World War I, “Testament of Youth” is a handsomely presented, if sometimes a bit restrained story of one woman’s voyage into pacifism.
Alicia “Ex Machina” Vikander stars as Brittain, a tenacious young woman who battles against her father’s (Dominic West) wishes and the conventions of the day to take the Oxford University entrance exam. Her schooling is interrupted when WWI breaks out and brother Edward (Taron “Kingsman: The Secret Service” Egerton), her fiancé Roland Leighton (Kit “Game of Thrones “ Harington) and friends Victor (Colin Morgan) and Geoffrey (Jonathan Bailey) are sent to fight at the front lines. With her friends at risk Vera opts to join them, leaving school to enrol as a nurse in the Voluntary Aid Detachment. Tending to both German and English soldiers in London, Malta and France she learns first hand about personal loss, human suffering and the futility of war.
“Testament of Youth” offers up a different, parallel view to combat, than the usual war film. Told from the point of view of a battle nurse, it is different but no less effecting as a story of female strength. Vikander is the movie’s soul and strength, handing in a performance that is both strong willed and remarkably nimble. When Vera pretends to be the German girlfriend of a dying soldier, the performance transcends the “Downton Abbey” vibe of the production. Moments like these are almost an antidote to the melodrama that masquerades as actual emotion in other scenes. Almost but not quite.
The supporting performances work well enough, although other than Vera the emotional connection necessary for the anti-war message to be truly effective is missing. Large scale shots of dead and dying men in battle and hospitals visualize the sentiment but a real, personal connection with the characters would have been more fitting for a story about a woman so absolutely changed by the war and her experiences.
“Testament of Youth” is based on a true and well-documented story but a dose or three of melodrama—does she really have to get such bad news on her wedding day?—blunts the power of the story.
A year ago, Edmonton-born actress Olivia Cheng says she was familiar with Marco Polo as an Italian traveller “and I obviously knew about the swimming pool game, but that is about it.”
Now, as the star of the new Netflix adventure series about Polo’s early years, she’s captivated by the story.
“When I saw the first script I said, ‘Where’s the second script? Then the third, fourth, fifth…’”
The handsome 10-episode season follows Polo’s travels on the Silk Road to the court of Mongolian emperor Kublai Kahn.
It’s a study of political skulduggery, greed and sexual politics, 13th-century style.
Imagine Game of Thrones with martial arts and an international cast headed by Rick The Fast and the Furious Yune and Joan Chen and you get the idea.
“All of my stuff was shot in studio in Malaysia,” says Cheng, who spent five months on location.
“I’ve never had an opportunity to immerse myself so fully in a role and be able to focus like that. You’re almost in a cocoon or a bubble, where you are constantly thinking about the story, constantly thinking about the nuances. I would often walk from set to set watching different scenes. I just got to immerse myself in the world of Marco Polo and experience a cultural adventure that I’m really grateful for.”
The actress, who also plays Linda Park on Arrow and The Flash, says the show’s elaborately tailored wardrobe helped her find the character of Mei Lin, a royal concubine and martial arts expert.
“When you have the beautiful costumes, you are able to step into a world and suddenly it informs you,” she says.
“That is a huge gift as an actor because a costume can make you move a certain way; you are in your body in a certain way because of the weight of the material. For me, I felt like it made me so much more graceful. You have to be, in order not to trip in those costumes.”
But just as interesting as watching the world of Marco Polo being built was a scene where she tries to pull it all apart.
“I can’t tell you how amazing it was to get to film White Moon — this epic fight scene with 200 extras all dressed in white,” she says.
“I felt so grateful because I saw all the effort it took to create this world for me to run in and try and destroy it.”
The Hobbit author J.R.R. Tolkien described dragon Smaug as “a most specially greedy, strong and wicked worm.” The Flight of the Conchords have a song called Albi the Racist Dragon, and on Dragon Day at Cornell University, an effigy of one of the giant beasts is burned while students shout and dance.
They can be fiery, fearsome creatures. “Noble dragons don’t have friends,” writes Terry Pratchett in Guards! Guards! “The nearest they can get to the idea is an enemy who is still alive.”
It’s not hard to understand why the folks on Game of Thrones are wary of Daenerys Targaryen’s (Emilia Clarke) brood of the beasts when she spouts off lines like, “When my dragons are grown, we will take back what was stolen from me and destroy those who wronged me! We will lay waste to armies and burn cities to the ground!” Then there’s Bryagh, the serpentine villain of The Flight of Dragons who not only insults the movie’s heroes before dispatching them, he also gobbles up the eggs of other dragons!
Maybe if characters in movies paid more heed to the advice given by author Steven Brust — “Always speak politely to an enraged dragon” — then movies and TV wouldn’t have to offer up such a wide array of ways to rid the world of dragons. Look on IMDb, there are dozens of titles containing the phrase “dragon slayer.”
The 2010 animated hit How to Train Your Dragon begins in a remote Viking village where killing a dragon is “everything.” It focuses on Hiccup (Jay Baruchel), a kind- hearted boy who captures one of the flying behemoths and discovers two things: One, he can’t bring himself to kill it, and two, that dragons aren’t the fearful monsters everyone thinks they are. He becomes a Dragon Whisperer and the movie shows the serpentine creatures in a different light than the abysmal brutes usually seen on screen.
This weekend, How to Train Your Dragon 2 adds to the list of cinematic dragons who are more misunderstood than actually evil.
The 1941 Disney flick The Reluctant Dragon features a dragon that would rather recite poetry than cause havoc. “You’ve got to be mad to breathe fire,” he says, “but I’m not mad at anybody.”
In the live-action DragonHeart, a fire-breather must team with a dragon-slaying knight (Dennis Quaid) to end an evil king’s rule. When the giant serpent is accused of eating an adversary, he is indignant. “I merely chewed in self-defense, but I never swallowed.”
Eddie Murphy lent some comedic relief to the 1998 animated movie Mulan as the tiny, blue-horned Mushu. He may be the size of the Geico gecko, but don’t mention it. “I’m a dragon, not lizard. I don’t do that tongue thing.”
Richard walked through the Game of Thrones exhibit at the TIFF Bell Lightbox for Canada AM this morning. Join him as he has a look at the swords, skulls and augmented reality!
