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SHOTGUN WEDDING: 2 ½ STARS. “a bit of everything except suspense or deep laughs.”

Jennifer Lopez walks a similar path to Marie Osmond in “Jenny from the Block’s” new Amazon Prime action comedy. Marie is a little bit country, and a little bit rock ‘n roll, while “Shotgun Wedding” showcases Jennifer’s duality, a little bit of amore, and a little bit of adrenaline.

When we first meet Darcy (Lopez) and Tom (Josh Duhamel) it is the night before their elaborate Philippine destination wedding. Family and friends, played by funny people like Jennifer Coolidge, Cheech Marin, D’Arcy Carden and Sônia Braga, and Darcy’s hunky ex-boyfriend (Lenny Kravitz), come from far and wide to celebrate the big day.

“I’ve been looking forward to this moment,” says Carol (Coolidge), “since Tommy was cut out of my belly.”

Trouble is, Tom is too focused on the details. In his effort to make everything seamless, he overlooks the most important element of the day, his bride-to-be. “What if the wedding isn’t perfect? What if your parents never like me?”

As friction develops between the couple, on another part of the island the entire wedding party is taken hostage by pirates who want the fortune held by the bride’s father.

Separated from the group, the couple must play a dangerous game of till death do us part to save their loved ones and their relationship.

“This weekend hasn’t exactly gone to plan,” Tom says.  “Pirates chasing you wasn’t on your vision board” replies Darcy.

“Shotgun Wedding” is a bit of a rollercoaster, and not in a good way. A jumbled mix of slapstick and action, of comedy and relationship drama, it careens through the story so quickly, with no tether to any kind of reality, that it becomes positively whiplash inducing.

Despite the likability of the topline cast, it feels as though it mixes the worst elements from the various genres that make up the story. A combination of the predictability of a rom com and some lame, light action (although a surprisingly high body count for a wedding movie), it has a bit of everything except suspense or deep laughs.

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